A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE

I have a stalker, nope not that kind of stalker with crazy $h*t and death threats (though in my opinion this chic is just as crazy). This type of stalker just follows you about the internet liking all your pictures and comments. My very own fan girl.

Most stalkers have a shrine of your pictures at some hidden alter, well i can tell you that her shrine isn't hidden at all and all the pictures are framed, hanging out in the sitting room.

From my first burp (smile), to last weeks surprise shot during dinner(where i looked like Alvin's long lost cousin), all my embarassing moments are set on display for the world to see.

Yes, you understand me now. My mum, My stalker. I'm bloody sure am not the only son with a single mum out there but sometimes it seems like i drew the shortest straw.

It wasn't always like this, all my life up until my sixteenth birthday we were the best of pals and then every thing crumbled when i found out that she had lied to me all along.

To find out that the dad i had always wanted, cried for when i was younger was actually an inconsiderate jerk who dumped her when he found out she was pregnant (from listening to a phone coversation i had no business hearing in the first place), Is alot to take in.

My mum and i used to be able to talk about anything, girls, relationships, friendship, school even her job as a lawyer and cases shes dealth with, she had always been straight up with me.

My friends call me 'mama's boy' but i have never been bothered by it. So why did she feel like she couldn't talk to me? Did she think that i couldn't  handle the truth? What ever, right now she doesn't even know i know the truth.

So for the last two months, i have been giving her the shoulder (i really do hate being lied to) , spending more time at the basket ball court with my guys, or just hanging out with Ben and Cesear, my best friends. When i'm at home i text them or girls who want to hook up, my phone has become my constant companion and she detests it.

Yup, she's one of those mums with the technology rules and i know it kind of irritates her to not be able to talk to me about stuff especially when she comes back late and excited about something that probably happened at the firm, maybe this situation would push her out there so she can make friends and start dating again.

Do you have any idea how lame it is when your mum is the first person to comment or like your status? No? Well i wish i didn't too, I guess this is her way of irritating me.

At first i didn't notice because she didn't use her real name.She used 'hotmamaforever' (who does that?!). I gradually began to see her footsteps just behind mine on the internet, Like an ominious cloud, she followed me every where.

From face book to twitter, my space, nimbuzz, whatsapp, she's a member and my follower on all my social networks (this is a crime? right?)

The good thing is i can't be bullied by my friends about it, my school also has a zero bullying tolerance (she made sure) besides appearance is enough to discourage the idea. All these years of football and basket ball paid off (*kissing my guns).

The guys don't even mind, they think it's funny, they love checking out her pictures, in their minds she's a milf (the first and last person that mentioned it to my face ended up in intensive care unit at the hospital).

It really is the worst day on earth when it's saturday and it's raining, all the plans for the weekend made over the week just goes down the drain and you are stuck home with your parents.

Tired of my self exhile to the room, i came into the sitting room with earbuds on and sat on the sofa beside her. An episode of supernatural is on the tv but she's not watching it, she's doing something with her phone (stalking me probably).

"Jude.. baby, i had no idea".

I look up at her and she has tears running down her face.

"baby", she says, "i had no idea, am so sorry i would have told you. I just didn't want you to think that no one wanted you. I wanted you enough for both of us".

Ooh yes, she follows and fans me on watt pad and blogger too, how could i forget.

Ok, so maybe i didn't forget and writing a rant about how i felt was just what the shrink ordered, the only way this cold war would end. Obviously she read it.

Now she's coming to give me a hug, like when i was five and she said a kiss and a hug would make the pain go away. Am not sure about this but am going to let her try. I have kinda missed them.

*After lots of hugs, kisses and apologies (from both the guilty and rude parties), i'm back upstairs in my room waiting for dinner where she has promised to tell me the truth, all of it. She thinks i want to have a relationship with the jerk, damn right i do. My fist badly wants to meet his face.

Minus her stalking, she's really the best parent any one could have, i'm proud of her and i'm not ashamed to say. "I love you mum".